Living in Limbo

So, here we still are. Rob and I have been our-homeless for almost a month, sold absolutely everything except skis and winter clothing (even the Jeep is gone), and still waiting for our e-tickets. In the past four weeks, it hasn’t been an emotional fun time. From feelings of excitement to nervousness, overwhelmed to helplessness. It’s the first non-summer feel I’ve ever had.

Have there been doubts about this entire move???? Oh yes there have been.

Sitting here right now in a home that isn’t mine, surrounded by boxes of clothing and personal items that would squish into suitcases, I feel unlike myself (which is a pretty scary thing when I believe in always being the ‘real me’ no matter what circumstance). I’m mentally located where going down to the kitchen to make a coffee or food seems more of a chore then to walk 10 minutes to a place called Fairgrounds Organic Coffee; which we have also dubbed as our temporary home. There is no place like your OWN home, or your OWN space (and I don’t mean parents either).

I think the only thing holding me together today, with a slight blip in a breakdown yesterday, was contacting the travel agents (although I should have just ‘waited patiently’) and finding out they have Rob and I on their list to organize flights. A gentlemen said that I was to receive the tickets today – yes, today – for a flight this week. Do I believe him? Do I trust him? Can I believe him?  I don’t know. Scary huh? The lack of credibility from the consultants that are working with **** and their travel agents is disappointing to say in the least. They NEED us, but it seems they are way over their heads in organizing 1000 teachers plus families at one go.

At this point, when we’ve given up everything; our jobs, our rental unit, our car, our furniture and everything else you can imagine (although all materials), how do you know when to call “it quits”? Comparatively, how do you know when to “abandon a book” you’ve been reading?

Last night walking home from our java-shop, I compared this “limbo life” to owning a beater car. When do you give up on it? If you put an extra $1000 into the car, it might go for another couple of years, but then again, it might be a lemon and keep asking for repairs. It’s no different then leaving the standard living here like we have been up until now and waiting for a ticket to begin an experience of the unknown. But how long do you wait? Our employers told us to be ready as of August 1st. It’s now the 30th. What’s one more day? One more week? When do we give up and say “It was a good go anyway”.

It’s very frustrating. It’s probably one of the most frustrating experiences thus far, but yet different. This is not the frustration experienced when working for a principal that doesn’t give you a perm if you don’t kiss her ass, or having people in your life constantly asking “When are you going to buy a house?” “Have kids?” or “Why are you so lost in life?”

What we want is a new experience, and why not? We’re young, feeling alive, and wanting to live life. I’m not waiting for retirement to live my life, so why not do it when I’m 31! I know it’ll all work out once I get there. There are about 400 teachers there, living it up in a five-star hotel, have found out where they are teaching, living after the hotel and visiting the amazing sights, and experiencing a new culture. It is real.

When I look to what is GOING TO HAPPEN, it’s amazing. It may be tough, it may be tiring, but I look forward to it. It’s not the patience I have that’s holding me to this experience. It’s hope.

Hope all of you are well. I will keep you posted.
Smile, I am (even right now), *Mel

A Way of Thinking

Well, here it is. My thoughts, my experiences, and my journey. You know, I was never the "writing type", but I'm definitely the "thinking type". This all changed one day when a man (my mentor) so wise and real said to me, "When I read what you write, it's like you're talking to me. I feel as if I'm reading a book, and can connect". And so, here I am with the confidence to do so, and sharing it with whom ever wants to be entertained or intrigued. Most importantly though, it's a way I can share my journey with myself (especially as I am a visual learner).

Out of the Box. The title to my blog represents a lot to me. I know people say "You have to think outside of the box", but does anyone really? or even more, does anyone really want you to? Being outside of the box is a continual challenge. People usually want others to conform, confirm, and go with the flow in life's major morals, values, and expectations. Not us. You only get one life, so why not shake it up a bit!

So, here I am. I just turned 31 years old (wahoo!), and over a month ago Rob and I made the decision to leave the "physical box" of teaching in Mississauga, him in construction, so that our "out of the box" mentality was relieved and smiling once again. I accepted a job contract to teach Kindergarten in Abu Dhabi, UAE, for two years. Holy smokes! - ABU DHABI!!!!!! As I sit here with a smirk on my face, literally waiting for two e-tickets for Rob and myself to leave in the next two weeks, I remember the day in early June receiving a text from Rob saying "Teach in Abu Dhabi?".  At first I was thinking "Where?", but the sound of the place (say it out loud, it's neat!) sounded interesting enough already. With a short ride home in the Jeep top-down, a craigslist ad lead me to the Teach Away Inc. website where the hiring of 1000 teachers to teach for the **** in an English-immersion, student-centred environment reform was being advertised. Hmmmm..... could we do this? Pick up, sell absolutely EVERYTHING and GO???? Our answer "SURE, WHY NOT!"  Surprisingly, Rob and I didn't flip for it like we usually do on decisions. Yes, we literally get out a quarter and "flip" to make a decision when we are being indecisive. For example, I remember the day in a store on Queen St. E. Toronto when we were contemplating buying a Fatboy Bean Bag because we had no sofas. Let's just say we carried it all the way home, and the lady couldn't believe it as she turned her back while the "flip" was in action - to think a big sale was going to come down to a flip. LOL. I love it.

So, to say in the least, after the application process, interviews, and emotional ups and downs, we are going to ABU DHABI! We have moved in with his parents for the time being, surrounded by boxes and bags of the stuff we'll take, and store a bit of what we want to save (those skis baby!).

As we continue the journey of our lives together, we hope you too will enjoy it as I keep you updated.

Smile, I am. *Mel